**F*R*I*E*N*D*S**

I am not one to have a huge circle of friends. I tend to keep my inner circle small because I have trust issues and find it easier to keep my relationships in tact with a smaller group then a larger group. My problem is that in the past people have proven me right instead of proven me wrong. I value honesty and loyalty in my relationships.

My closest friend is Janet who I have know and been inseperable with for the past 3 1/2 years. I love her to death but lately we have been growing apart. She has three kids (Chris Jr., Kiyah, and Kiarra). I love them like they were my own family. Janet is 33, going on 34 this year and is divorced. We come from totally seperate worlds but were able to build a friendship because we are very similar in our personalities. I purchased a 2008 Lancer SE last year and gave it to Janet because she did not have a reliable mode of transportation. The car is in my name only but she drives it, maintains it, and pays for the car payment and insurance. That is where the major problem in our friendship lies. She has not taken the best of care to the car - honestly it looks like a five year, used up with kids eating and spilling crap everywhere, dings and dents, late payments, you name it. I see this as the way she views our friendship because I went out on a limb, screwed up my credit, to help her out. I love her to death but we got into a huge fight a week ago and I told her to leave me alone and when I am ready to talk to her I will. Funny thing is I don't mind seeing her, I just don't want to talk to her.....If that makes sense. Everything is up in the air with her right now but I know this is not a deal breaker in our friendship, just a hard fucked up leason to learn.

I also have made some good friendships at work - Cooper, Julie, Jake, and Megan are people who I am thankful for knowing and value as my friends. Jake has been my buddy since day one. He hit the floor a month or so before I did and I have sat next to him for the past two years. He was the first person I got to know on the team and oddly enough, the first Mormon I knew (I am sure I have met others before but never knew from the getgo). He has taught me a lot about patience, religion, Mormons, love, and life. I am sure he doesn't even know that because I don't talk to him about that crap but he really has. He has given me really good advice about what to do with my life and my relationships. He is one of the most genuine, sweetest, funnies, coolest Momo's I have met :) He will apprecaite that comment. Through him I also met his wife, Mallory, who is also just as great of a person as he is. Together they created Connor who is just adorable and lucky to have Mallory and Jake as his parents. He will grow up to be an amazing young man. Jake and the family are moving within the next couple weeks to Utah and I can't even think of what it will be like to not see his face at work five days a week, talk about his baby, catch up on how well Mallory is doing.....It is unreal to imagine not knowing them but I know I have some newfound, good friends with them and will make it my mission to keep in contact with them....Even though they are going to be in another state.

Cooper and Julie.....What can I not say about them?! Cooper is so spunky and quirky and I just love it. She is positive and infectious which is amazing to feel and be influenced by. I have become really close with her and Julie the last year. They were open enough to allow me into their lives and show me what it is like to have friends who not only take but give back and are more then happy to lend a helping hand when you need it. Julie is probably the second red head I have ever known, haha. She is fiesty as hell, passionate, friendly, strong, and determined. She helped me gain the confidence in myself to make the changes in my life I only dreamt of doing. Julie helped me become motivated and strong. I can never thank her enough for the transformation she has helped me begin! I am glad I have become closer to Cooper and Julie because I see life long friendships with them and glad to have people so amazing in my life and to see that I can trust people and that they have my back when I need it the most. I can't believe Julie is leaving tomorrow to New Mexico. At least I have an excuse to visit that state now :)

Megan.....Man do I love her! We have been through a lot together at work and have been each others side kick and rock through all that crap. I am glad I had her to lean on because I am not sure how well I would have dealt with things had she had not been there. She is the sweetest, funniest, and wittiest person I have met. She is honest and never holds back. She is genuine and "sparkles". She introduced me to the world of reading and opening myself to things I have never considered before. I have been able to tell her things that I have not told anyone before about my relationship with my dad, my view on religion, my anger towards God at one point for taking away my grandpa.....All my confussed feelings. She was able to make me feel comfortable enough to talk about those things and to be willing to listen to what someone else has to say. She is moving too! She will be joining Jake in Utah....I guess I have to go there now :)

These are just snipits of how I feel about these people. I don't like to get too mushy but wanted to share my apprecaition for these amazing people in my life. That is all for now. I'm sure I will have more to write about soon because my life is never dull!