Looking Forward to 2009

2009 seems to be off to a great start for me and it isn't even here yet! I get my braces off anywhere between Feb and April depending on how my teeth do in the next two visits. I will be going to see Britney in concert in April which is something I have wanted to do for over 5 years now. I will be going to the Bahamas in March and will finally be graduated with my BSM degree in March. Also some of the movies I have been anticipating are coming out next year! I'm talking Nororious, Underworld, Madea Goes to Jail, Watchmen, The Wolfman, Star Trek, Night at the Museum 2, Terminator, Ice Age 3, Wolverine, Transformers 2, Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, and Where the Wild Things Are. Good thing I have my suvenier cup and shirt for cheap soda and popcorn HAHA! All I can say is.....So far so good! I am really looking forward to all of these things and seeing what else 2009 has in store for me. Right now all I can think of is my cruise to the Bahamas and Britney's concern in April. Time to get my official comeback in gear so I can look fabulous, fly, and sexy for them! Operation get-Liz's-ass-in-shape begins now!!! I am terrified I won't be able to fit in a wetsuit and swim with the dolphins. Plus I need to lose some weight to fit into the outfit I plan on wearing to see Britney :)

I GOT THE GOLDEN TICKET!!!!

I GOT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I bought my tickets today for Britney! I am pumped! They were totally worth every penny and I will be so close to the stage!

Seriously, if she wipes her brow of sweat it will hit me in the face. That is how I roll!!! Me and Janet are going to go and we decided we are going to dress up like Britney when we go to the concert. I am going to be Ringmaster Britney (ringmaster hat, ringmaster jacket, black pants, black boots, and a long wavy blonde wig) and Janet will be Toxic Flgith Attendent Britney (blue flight attendent dress, flight attendent hat, little shoulder jacket, blonde wig, blue heels). I can't wait for April to hurry up and get here. Here are pictures of the costumes we are going to get for the concert (Janet's is a darker blue then in the Toxic video so we will have to do something about that). I also posted a picture of the arena and where I will be sitting ha-ha! Enjoy!!!!

It's Britney B!TCH

YEAHHHHH!!!!!!!!! I have officially died and gone to heaven, then come back to earth to re-live the awesomeness that is Ms. Britney Spears! Not only has she been returning to the scene with tons of appearances and performences but today marks a GLORIOUS day for me and Brit Fans everywhere. Today she dropped her latest cd Circus and announced her tour dates for next year. That's right people, me and Britney have a date on April 24th 2009! I have wanted to see her in concert since the Onyx Tour and it has been 5 years since she last toured for any of her music. This is going to be one of the best shows I have seen! She will also have to promote her last album Blackout during this tour since she didn't last year when it came out. In my opinion, Blackout was her BEST cd by far. Say what you want about her but I love her no matter what. I never stopped believing that she would come back. She may still be slightly crazy but I like it. I am a loyal Brit fan and have been since Slave 4 U. I like her grown up image and music. It is stuff I can shake my ass to in the clubs and I like it ;) Ticket Master has a pre-sale on her concert tickets today until Friday then on Saturday they are sold to the public so I will be getting my ticket by Thursday night. YEAHHHHH!!!! Expect more blogs and pics about this and other things going on for me next year.

Halloween

I know this is a little late but here are a few pictures of my brother Elijah and my nephew Ethan dressed up for Halloween. Elijah was really excited about his Optimus Prime costume. Ethan was Squirt from Finding Nemo, we got his costume when we went to Disneyland back in September. They both got tons of candy even though there weren't that many people handing out candy this year. I think there were about 4-5 houses down each block handing out candy which sucked but what can you do? Poor Ethan passed out for most of the trick or treating but thankfully we had him in the stroller so no one had to carry him around. I can't believe he is 8 months old! After we went through four blocks we went back home to help hand

out candy, Elijah really liked handing out the candy to the other kids which was cute!

What's New and What's to Come

This is just an update of what I have been up to in the last few weeks. Really I can't remember that far back so we will just start from 10/30 :) Thursday 10/30 was Cooper's bachelorette party which was AWESOME! We bar hopped down Mill Ave which is something I have never done before or ever really thought about doing. I wasn't too sure how it was going to turn out because there were about 20 chicks in the group which always make me a little nervous when there is that much estrogen in a room. Everyone got along great and we all had a lot of fun. We all wore blank tank tops with pink lettering that was hilarious (see if you can make it out in the picture) and "special" little name tags. I gave Coop 150% which wasn't too hard since I am such a light weight when it comes to drinking. We got a free shot of CRAP at one club (kid you not it tasted like cough syrup and brought back memories of when my mom used to have to chase me down and force it down my throat!) and did a little dancing to get the night started off right. By the end of the night I was so trashed I fell off of the toilet and laughed my ass off while my pants were still at my ankles. I really wish I had a picture to remember that because I have never been that drunk and plan on never revisiting that again! LOL. I can't party like that much because I am such a pansy when it comes to drinking and don't like the after effects (being really freaking thirsy, hang overs, headaches, sensitiveness to light, breaking out in pimples, etc). I have a rule, if I go out it has to be for a reason to celebrate, it can't just be to go out and get drunk and I think I chose a pretty good reason to go out. Cooper had the most fun which was the point and I am glad she went out with one last bang to celebrate and wave goodbye to her single days :) That will probably be the last time I go out and drink for at least another year HAHA. Friday was Halloween and a good day to sleep off the night before which I really needed after waking up from a nap. Saturday was the wedding and it was one of the fastest ceremonies EVER! It was awesome and fit Coop to the "t". The reception was really nice and she looked so pretty and happy. That was probably the most excitement I have had in a while. Other then that I am really counting down the days before the move and TWILIGHT comes out - only 13 days to go! I move on the same day the movie comes out! I haven't even started packing so I really need to start getting my butt up to do things otherwise I will be doing everything last minute. I am excited about the move but also sad because I will miss living with my sister and seeing the baby all the time, he is my little chunker and my buddy. That is it for now, enjoy some of the pictures I posted. I will post a couple other blogs in the next 13 days :)

More updates

I got a raise at work and let me tell you it is about freaking time! I am doing really good so far. I decided to sign up and take my last two HUM classes instead of taking the CLEP tests because I need to save up my money for decorating my new bathroom and bedroom at my new house and I am too freaking lazy to study and actually take the damn things. Oh well. It was nice taking a little break. I started going to the gym yesterday. Monday was cardio (the joy of my life) and Tuesday was upper body. Tomorrow is good ol cardio again, Thursday is lower body, and Friday is wonderful cardio for one more day to make me smile. Let me tell you, the gym and me are no strangers but it is not my favorite. I can name over a million things I would rather do but I have goals that I want to hit this coming year and know that I need to start getting my butt off the couch and do what I have to do. Eating is harder for me manage because I love sweets, carbs, food. LOL. Oh well, baby steps. I have a 12 week plan that I am dead serious about seeing through. I will post a before picture soon with a new blog and then give a monthly update (4 months total for my plan). We will see how I shape out when it is all over. My friend Julie is really inspiring, supporting, and motivating me to do this, even if it is on my own. Did I say how much I miss her? I miss Jake and Megan too. My friend Cooper is getting married on November 1st so I am trying to find a dress to wear. I am on the hunt! I am looking for a multipurpose dress so I can get my moneys worth out of it. I decided to grow my hair out because I miss having long pretty hair that I can put in a ponytail LOL. I don't know, I will probably just keep it short like it is right now because it fits me better personality wise and is so easy to do! My nephew is getting HUGE, he is seven months old now and starting to army crawl so we know he is going to start actually crawling soon. I will miss not seeing him all the time when I move but I know moving with my mom is a good decision for me. I will still see him. Britney's new song came out last week and I love it of course! Her video is coming out this Friday. AND she is going to go on a world wide tour next year so I am saving up for that. I plan on having front row and backstage passes so I can meet her so if it means me saving $1000 for a ticket I am doing it. Yeah, its like that! I am trying to think of anything else that is going on.....Oh yeah! Heroes is back and killing it! This is by far the BEST season. Every Monday I have minor strokes from all the excitement. I am syked for what is to come the rest of this season until December 15th when it goes on a break for the holidays. I am also planning a trip to the Bahamas on a cruise which I have wanted to do for a LONG time. That is about it for now. I will start a blog about my Body For Life 12 week plan soon with a "before" picture so try to be gentle because it isn't pretty :)

Moving to the East Side

So it has been over a month since the last time I blogged and I realized I am overdue thanks to my beautiful friend Julie. Things have changed in my family to those who are not around much but to me this is something that has been going on for a couple of months now. My mom and dad are going to be officially divorced by November and my mom has just recently purchased a gorgouse home in Maricopa, AZ. I have decided to walk away from my house and foreclose on my home for a few reasons; I cannot afford the mortgage on my own, I cannot afford the maintanance and upkeep (I need a new AC, new appliances, new pipes, new carpet), and I am stuck in a ARM (Adjustable Rate Mortgage) that starts going up in May 09 that I have tried to refinance six times in the last year and have been turned down because I was stupid and took out a second car in my name for a friend to drive. So I am going to be living with my mom in her new house out in boondocksville Maricopa where there are no street lights, coyotes smushed along the side of the freeway, scorpions, black widows, and the nasty smell of cows on a nice hot day or on a day with a breeze. My kind of living! I see it as a great way to save money to start paying off my student loans and my car to help out my credit as much as possible knowing it will be negatively affected by losing my house, I can spend more time with my brother who is my favoritest person in the world, and help out my mom through the divorce but also help her with her arthritus. We are excited about the new house and already doing the shopping which is the funnest part. I LOVE decorating! I will pretty much rule the upstairs with my brother being second in command, the downstairs is all my mom. I will update my blog with more info once that happens. So I will no longer be a West Sider....I have only ever known the west side of Phoenix. My friend Jake will get a kick out of me being on the East Side now. Maricopa is a 31 mile drive from my job in Tempe and I have no idea what the traffic is like on the 10 East Bound.

It Was Fun While It Lasted

So my trip to California is officially over. We got back into town around 3pm yesterday afternoon. The trip was very eventful, both good and bad. Saturday we drove up to California and left AZ around 10am. We had to drop off my nephew Ethan at my aunt's house in Goodyear to watch while we were on our trip. We got into Blythe, CA around 2pm and stopped by a McDonald's to get some food on the go and wrap up our trip. There was a little bit of rain on the way up to California but I never had to turn on my wind shield wipers because the rain just went up to my roof since I was going over 75 mph. San Diego/San Bernadino got slammed with rain and had a flash flood warning while we were on the road. The sky was pitch black to the right of my car so I am glad we got to skip that storm completely. We got to our first hotel, Holiday Inn Express in Garden Grove, CA around 4pm. This was an awesome hotel. The rooms were HUGE, the hotel itself was pretty new (built in 2001) and was in a great location. We decided to just order pizza and eat in because we were all tired from the long drive. After dinner we went to the swiming pool with my brother and my cousin. I hung out in the spa while my mom, dad, and sister Maria watched the kids. I feel asleep around 7pm, I was knocked out! I felt bad for my sister because I fell asleep while we were talking HAHA. I woke up around 4am and took a few pictures of our room and bathroom that I still need to upload and then called my mom and we went walking around the hotel for a little since everyone was still fast asleep. We checked out of our hotel around 10am and went down to our cars to leave towards Huntington Beach when my mom's car got infested with ants. My dad parked the car right on the curb and disturbed an ant hill and those ants were pissed! I wish I took pictures because it took about 30-40 minutes to get the majority of the ants out of their car and get houskeeping to spray the ant hill. There are still ants coming out of the hood of her car! We eventually got to the beach and it was gorgous! We were there for about 4 hours and met my cousin Brittany there. We have tons of pictures from the beach. I actually got in the water and learned that sea water tastes disgusting and that I cannot swim well in the ocean. I got sand in every nook and cranny...my ears still have some sand in them and I have cleaned the crap out of them. I was tossed everywhere. I also got a really bad sunburn and looked like a lobster for the remainder of our trip LOL. Good thing my burns turn into amazing tans :) I did not plan on going in the water and rolled my pants up so I could go ankle deep to watch my brother when a wave came and took me out and I got soaked. I had my new cell phone in my pant pocket that I just got two weeks ago and did not add insurace on...Needless to say that phone is dead. The batter actually had corrosion on it and fried. Me and my sister went back to my car to change into our swim suites because at that point we might as well go in the water. We went to eat lunch after the beach with my cousin and then around 4pm went to check into our other hotel, Anabella Hotel, which was directly behind California Adventure. Me and my sister went to the spa and had the most expensive pedicures we have ever had in our lives.....I spent $78.00!! Needless to say, there was no leaving a tip. After that we decided to go to Medieval Times for dinner around 7pm. We were there for about an hour or so when I noticed my brother was sneezing, sniffling, and coughing a lot. He wasn't acting like himself so I kept bugging him. We took him outside and gave him some of my dads inhaler and had to leave because it did not get better. We left right when the show was about to get good with all the fighting and jousting. We had to find a close by Walgreens to get him some Benadril and he felt better instantly. Something we will need to remember if we ever do that again! Apparently he is allergic to horses and the smoke! We got home around 10pm because my dad thought he knew where he was going and we ended up in La Mirada county and had to turn all the way around to go the opposite direction. Monday I woke up around 6am and we all went to breakfast around 8am. We hitched a ride on the park trolley's and spent most of the day at Disneyland. We got on a few rides but not a whole lot because my cousin is scared of the dark, scared of loud noises, and scared of roller coasters....What kind of fun is that! We got on Autopia, Matterhorn, Nemo, and the carrisel and then headed for lunch. After lunch we went over to California Adventure and rode the grand rapids ride. My brother was an inch short last year and really wanted to go on it, he was so happy that this year he grew another inch and could ride. My mom got SOAKED, you could see her underwear through her khaki pants! LOL. We went back to the hotel for naps and then went back to the parks around 6pm to do a few more rides. We hit the haunted mansion, pirates, Autopia again, and rode the train around the park. We headed back to the hotel around 9pm. The parks were PACKED and the lines had over an hour wait so we didn't get a whole lot of rides in, even if we could we were limited on the rides we could go on because of my cousin. He had to be walked out within two minutes of being on the haunted mansion ride because he got scared. My brother had a blast though! We drove back to Arizona around 8am in the morning after stopping at Denny's for breakfast and got back into town around 3pm. We were happy to get back but I wish we could have gone on more rides, met more characters, and caught a few of the shows. We got to see the fireworks though which were cool and part of the Fantasmic! show which was my first. There is always next time, I go a couple times a year. Next time we know: Do not park your car right on the curb because if you disturb an ant hill they will get into your car, either give my brother Benadril before going to Medieval Times or check out the Pirates Adventure dinner and show instead, do not wear street clothes to the beach, take out your phone from your pants and either leave it in the car or leave it on the beach with the rest of your stuff, wear sunblock to the beach and reapply often, do not open your mouth at the beach or you will taste pure SALT water (yeah I know that is what sea water is but it is still freaking nasty), wear ear plugs so you don't get sand in your ears, do not go to the parks on a holiday, and do not take my cousin unless you plan not to go on a lot of rides :)

California Here I Come!

As many of my friends know, I go to California about once or twice a year. Believe me, if I could afford it I would go triple that! Why do I go? To visit the happiest place on Earth.....DISNEYLAND! Tomorrow my family (Mom, Dad, Maria, Elijah, Kayti, and our cousin Dylan) are going to California until Tuesday morning for a nice long Labor Day weekend. Saturday we are going to just relax by the pool at our hotel in Garden Grove, CA after a 6 hour drive (6-8 because everyone likes to make those damn pit stops, if I had it my way we would just drive straight through). Sunday we check out of our first hotel around noon and go visit my cousin Brittany in Anaheim and go to the beach. We will check in to our other hotel right behind California Adventure around 4pm and then go to Medieval Times for a AWESOME dining experience. Monday is all about the parks baby - from 8am to midnight we are going to be going on rides rides and more rides! Then Tuesday we go back home to stinky Arizona. Oh and just to rub it in, the weather in California is supposed to be AMAZING - I am talking 80-70 degrees during the day here folks! I cannot wait to get the hell out of the 100+ temperatures in AZ. I will post another blog about our trip with pictures when we get back because I LOVE blogging :)

ARRGGHHHH!!!!!

WTF WTF WTF!!!!!?????? Let me clear my throat and get a few things out that have been building up. Tonight's news was the cherry topping on the ice cream sundea that is my life (third on the list). The bad is in black because it reflects my heart when all this went down. The good is in pink because I am happier.

FIRST my team at work was broken up two weeks ago and we were all split up and put on different teams with different managers. I am on a team with people who do not talk at all - but hey, at least I still have Logan, Troy, and Adam with me. Except, Troy is about to bounce the hell out of the eternal bog of stench called UOP next week.

SECOND my sister got a damn dog after I told her not too and the asshole is peeing and pooping everywhere. You can put him outside, rub his nose in it, and smack the shit out of him and the freaking dumb ass dog doesn't get it or just plain does not give a rats ass. He just looks at you like you are stupid and does it again!

THIRD, and this is the topper here.........Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince was supposed to come out November 21, 2008. The teaser trailer just came out a couple weeks ago and it is AWESOME. I literally got chills going down my back, my arm hair stood up on end, and I had a little tear of joy in my eye. Then what happens? The worst network in the world, WB, decided to push the release back a year to July 17th, 2009. Their reason? Two things....they did not have any big movies coming out next summer to bring the money in like The Dark Knight has due to the.....get this.....writers strike that happened last fall! What bull shit! Escpecially when the damn thing is already completed and in post production. I can't even remember the second reason because the first reason is gay enough. They pretty much just said a big F*** YOU to all the fans and made a horrible mistake letting everyone know that all they care about is money. Too bad for them that Transformers 2 comes out next summer and that is going to kick HP's ass! Optimus Prime rules, even against Harry Potter. Sadly the HP train has lost its steam, alure, and momentum with all the crazy bull shit the execs at WB have pulled. By the time the last movie comes out the actors who play Harry, Ron, and Hermonie will be able to play their adult parts in the last scene of book 7. Sorry but it is the truth because this is the last freaking straw. First they RUIN the movies by not following the books and then the piss off all the fans by not even promoting the movie until four months from its release date, then take it away like some sick joke.

Yeah, that's right I am pissed off about a dumb movie and ranting and raving about it. What are you going to do about it? That is right, just sit back and laugh at my expense. I would too if I were you right now. But with all bad things there are some good. These are what keep me going.

I actually really like my manager. He is more hands on then my other one and is taking more time out to sit with everyone and try to help them gain the skils necessary to at least stay afloat in the company. He has a lot to show everyone and is very encouraging and supportive. Plus he is cool with me cursing, burping, being loud and obnoxious, all the good stuff. Not to say my other manager was not a good manager because he was and I am sad that I am no longer part of his team, but he was also not as active in how well we all did and let a lot of things get way out of hand and out of control on the old team.

I also was able to complete the Twilight series with the final book, Breaking Dawn. I read the book in 26 hours and it was TOTALLY WICKED!!! I had about four moments where I could have sworn my heart stopped beating. This was my second favorite book by far in the series, following a hair away from the original Twilight. I can't wait until everyone I know is done reading it and I can actually talk about it in the open! AHHHH it is killing me to keep all my Twilight mania excitement bundled up in this short body of mine! There is only so much that 5 ft can hold!

Let me just say, I already have my TEAM EDWARD shirt to wear to the movie coming out December 12. I will be there opening night wearing my shirt proud and true and will be united by other Twilighters like myself who have fallen in love with Edward Cullen. He may be a figment of Stephenie Meyer's imagination but he is the single best thing that has come into my life in the last year. HAHA! That is pretty pathetic, but unfortunatly true. Let me ask you a question, does your werewolf sparkle? Didn't think so!

My brother Elijah started kindgergarten on Monday and I cannot believe how big he got. I am not ready for him to grow up. Next comes dances, girlfriends, sleep overs, sneaking out, lying, arguing, attitude, pimples, hair growing in weird places, voices changing......I AM NOT READY! I told him if any girls talk to him in school to push them in the dirt and run. If they don't get the hint I will have to make a stop by the school one day to set those little heffa's straight. LOL. I love him to death though and can't wait to see what kind of man he grows up to be with all us crazy ass women in his life.

And my trip to California is coming up in 2 weeks and let me just say that I cannot freaking wait to leave this horrible state called Arizona right now. I want to get as far away from my job as possible for a little bit to just breath. Disneyland is my escape. Where I can forget my worries and problems and just be a kid, take in all the crazy sights and lights and food and go to bed more exhausted then I have ever been in my life. I never get a goods night sleep like I do after spending a whole day at the park. My brother is big enough to go on the rides this year too so it will be really fun to make this an amazing experience for him. My family never got to do these things when my sisters and I were growing up because we never had the money to be able to even dream up this kind of trip, let alone go on it. It is nice that we can do this for my brother and make sure he gets what we lacked growing up :)

Okay I think I got it all out. Whew, I feel better! I am still bummed about HP but I have a plan. I am going to boycott all WB shows for the rest of the year. That means AMNT and Gossip Girl are shit out of luck. Whatever, I don't need them. I need my HP fix!!!! Good night all :)

Siyanara Sucker!

So yesterday (Saturday) turned out to be one of the most eventful nights I have had in a long time. Though it was eventful it was sad that this is the kind of action I get : I had a roommate move into my townhouse at the end of June. His name was Justin and he was 20 years old from Prescott, AZ. Justin and I had discussed my room for rent, rent, EVERYTHING countless times and he assured me what a great roommate he was and how responsible he was. I let him move in and we agreed that for the month of June he would pay $290 since he was moving in 2 weeks before the end of the month. Well when he got down here he only had $231. I decided that was fine because he ended up moving a week later then he was supposed to (lack of communication on his part and me always chasing him down to figure out what the hell was going on). That started my concern over him moving in. So Justin moved in at the end of June and we had discussed finances and I told him he needs to be able to pay me FULL rent by the first week of every month or there were going to be problems. I brought up the fact that he said he had the money to move in at the end of June and came up short and told him that will not be accepted going forward regardless of the situation. He agreed and assured me it would not be a problem. Well.....He said he was going to pay me rent on July 4th. July 4th comes around and I ask him where the rent money was and he said that his job sent it to the store location in Prescott and was mailing it back to his new store location and he would have it to me within a week. He was also starting a new job that pays more and would get paid on this past Saturday. So the agreement was that I would get money on Friday and Saturday from both of his jobs. This was no problem to me, as long as he let me know what was up and stayed true to his word. So Saturday rolls along and he comes home from work. I bring up rent and he plays stupid saying "Oh is it already Friday?"....First of all, come the fuck on you damn idiot! I hate people who play gay ass games. I called him out on it and told him that he said he would have rent for me Friday and Saturday. He said that his new job wants him to do 25 interviews selling knifes door to door before they send him a check, a week later. I told him that was not going to cut it. I was pretty much the biggest bitch in the state of AZ but whatever, I am good at it. I told him that he is living off of me for free and living pretty comfortably with a nice room to sleep in, AC, internet, cable, food....He is making me broke. I have not been able to pay my mortgage because I did not have that money and have been spending over $140 every week on groceries (don't get me started on gas each week!). He kept saying "I understand" to me and I got pissed telling him he does not understand because it is not affecting him. I told him he needed to get his shit straight and figure out what he was going to do because this is not going to continue. I then left because if I didn't I would have probably kicked him in the ass. Yeah I was that pissed off. So I go to my mom's and was thinking about what happened the whole drive there (big whoop a mile). I called Justin and told him that I am fed up and he has a decision - he can either pay me by next weekend or get the fuck out of my house. He asked if I could give him until Wednesday and I asked for what. He said so he does not find his crap outside in the street and can find somewhere else to stay. I thanked him for wasting my time and for negatively impacting everyone in my house. I then went back home because I was LIVID and did not want that douche piece of shit in my house alone. I went to his door and told him to give me my keys back and that he had to be out by Sunday night. Well, he packed his shit and moved out Saturday. That dumb ass tried to talk to me and thank me for letting him stay here. I asked my friend Janet to come over so I didn't do or say anything that I may regret later, or end up in jail. When he was done packing he just stood next to me so I asked if he needed something in a pretty bitchy tone and he said no so I walked outside to sit with Janet while she smoked. He followed me outside and said he wanted to thank me. I pretty much cut him off right there and told him to save his breath because I did not give a shit what he had to say. I told him I feel sorry for anyone that lets him move in because he is a peice of shit and needs to get his act together. He tried to thank me again and said "God bless you".....God bless your ass because he needs it WAY more then I do. I may cuss but I am not a bad person - I do not use people, I do not manipulate, I do not lie or steal. Fuck him. At that moment I told him to get the fuck off of my property and he was like "Okay bye" and I told him peiece out.

Funny and sad thing is it felt AMAZING to be such a frigid bitch. I feel like myself again. I am quick to call people out on their bullshit and let the other roommate slide. Hell no, not this time. I don't even feel bad at all about it. I just feel upset because this happened and could have been easily avoided if he would have a) not moved in, b) been able to live up to his word and handle his repsonsibilities, or c) I made enough money to pay for my house on my own.

Yeah that is my Saturday HAHA. I just don't know why I have that luck with roommates. I am not a bad person but why do people try to take advantage of me and use me? When can I start using other people? LOL. I just can't believe people sometimes and pitty those that are like my ex roommate Justin who have nothing going for themselves and will continue to mooch off of people throughout their life to amount to something. All I have to say is goodbye and good ridance. Now I have to figure out what I want to do because I cannot afford my mortgage on my own. My sister and her boyfriend live with me and pay rent but it is just not enough. I can rent my room out again, rent my house out, get a second job/pick up some OT hours at work and try to make ends meet, or just walk away and let my house get repossessed and get an apartment at 800 a month and be able to live in it comfortably. My mortgage is outragious - I pay $1092 a month plus $156 a month for HOA. If I was living in a pimped out, new house then I would be okay with it but my house was built in 1973 and still has the original marble carpet and green appliances. Honestly at this point it may not be a complete loss to let this thing go. So now I am undecided and trying to figure out my situation and not lose my cool and not go crazy. I want to crawl into a ball and just rock back and forth but I don't have time to slow down for one minute because I am trying to do thousands of things at one time. I can't afford to lose a single minute to lose my cool because I have to take care of myself, my sister, her baby, my pets.....Life sucks as an adult! Never grow up.

My head is so jumbled with crap and there is so much more I want to write but I am just so exhausted I could give a shit right now LOL. Hope you enjoyed this rant :)

This Weekend

This weekend has had a few things going on.....Saturday Julie left the hot state of Arizona behind for New Mexico. She always wanted to run through the fountains accross from our building on her last day so Friday me, Julie, and Cooper waited for 30 minutes by the fountains and you know what we got? NOTHING! What a jip. Then I had to come in Saturday morning to fill out an employee application for Aetna and those damn fountains were on!!!! I'm going to have to start planning a trip to see her in NM.

Speaking of the employee application for Aetna....I don't know what position it is for. The one I really want or the one I interviewed for on Tuesday. I guess we will see but how freaking awesome would it be if it was for the one I want?! My mom gave the hiring supervisor my resume on Tuesday after my interview and the lady seemed really excited so maybe I can just bypass the whole interview thing. HAHA you can only hope right?

I finished the Twilight series......again. I have OCED - Obsessive Compulsive Edward Dissorder. It was nice to go through the series again because I forgot some things. The next book comes out August 2nd and I wanted to refresh my memory before that book came out. I am also trying not to start a new series until I have read that book because I tend to get wrapped up in the books I am reading and find it hard to pick up something new right away. Countdown for the movie is officially started too! December 12 will be here in no time! I already have a shirt picked out to wear....Thats right, I am a dork and a Twilighter....I will support Team Edward all the way! If you have not read these books you are missing out on one of the best things to happen in a long time. This series has totally consumed me and made me a believer in reading. Now I want a stupid Volvo too!

I took my brother to see Wall-E Sunday morning and it was awesome! The movie is by far the best Pixar movie I have ever seen and believe me, I have seen them all! I want my own Wall-E he was just so freaking adorable! My brother did really good in the theatre too which was a blessing! I love spending time with my brother. He is my world but he drives me crazy too.

That wraps up my weekend. I can't believe it is already going to be the fourth of July! This year is flying by faster then I want it to. I need to start preparing stuff for my birthday/graduation celebration.

**F*R*I*E*N*D*S**

I am not one to have a huge circle of friends. I tend to keep my inner circle small because I have trust issues and find it easier to keep my relationships in tact with a smaller group then a larger group. My problem is that in the past people have proven me right instead of proven me wrong. I value honesty and loyalty in my relationships.

My closest friend is Janet who I have know and been inseperable with for the past 3 1/2 years. I love her to death but lately we have been growing apart. She has three kids (Chris Jr., Kiyah, and Kiarra). I love them like they were my own family. Janet is 33, going on 34 this year and is divorced. We come from totally seperate worlds but were able to build a friendship because we are very similar in our personalities. I purchased a 2008 Lancer SE last year and gave it to Janet because she did not have a reliable mode of transportation. The car is in my name only but she drives it, maintains it, and pays for the car payment and insurance. That is where the major problem in our friendship lies. She has not taken the best of care to the car - honestly it looks like a five year, used up with kids eating and spilling crap everywhere, dings and dents, late payments, you name it. I see this as the way she views our friendship because I went out on a limb, screwed up my credit, to help her out. I love her to death but we got into a huge fight a week ago and I told her to leave me alone and when I am ready to talk to her I will. Funny thing is I don't mind seeing her, I just don't want to talk to her.....If that makes sense. Everything is up in the air with her right now but I know this is not a deal breaker in our friendship, just a hard fucked up leason to learn.

I also have made some good friendships at work - Cooper, Julie, Jake, and Megan are people who I am thankful for knowing and value as my friends. Jake has been my buddy since day one. He hit the floor a month or so before I did and I have sat next to him for the past two years. He was the first person I got to know on the team and oddly enough, the first Mormon I knew (I am sure I have met others before but never knew from the getgo). He has taught me a lot about patience, religion, Mormons, love, and life. I am sure he doesn't even know that because I don't talk to him about that crap but he really has. He has given me really good advice about what to do with my life and my relationships. He is one of the most genuine, sweetest, funnies, coolest Momo's I have met :) He will apprecaite that comment. Through him I also met his wife, Mallory, who is also just as great of a person as he is. Together they created Connor who is just adorable and lucky to have Mallory and Jake as his parents. He will grow up to be an amazing young man. Jake and the family are moving within the next couple weeks to Utah and I can't even think of what it will be like to not see his face at work five days a week, talk about his baby, catch up on how well Mallory is doing.....It is unreal to imagine not knowing them but I know I have some newfound, good friends with them and will make it my mission to keep in contact with them....Even though they are going to be in another state.

Cooper and Julie.....What can I not say about them?! Cooper is so spunky and quirky and I just love it. She is positive and infectious which is amazing to feel and be influenced by. I have become really close with her and Julie the last year. They were open enough to allow me into their lives and show me what it is like to have friends who not only take but give back and are more then happy to lend a helping hand when you need it. Julie is probably the second red head I have ever known, haha. She is fiesty as hell, passionate, friendly, strong, and determined. She helped me gain the confidence in myself to make the changes in my life I only dreamt of doing. Julie helped me become motivated and strong. I can never thank her enough for the transformation she has helped me begin! I am glad I have become closer to Cooper and Julie because I see life long friendships with them and glad to have people so amazing in my life and to see that I can trust people and that they have my back when I need it the most. I can't believe Julie is leaving tomorrow to New Mexico. At least I have an excuse to visit that state now :)

Megan.....Man do I love her! We have been through a lot together at work and have been each others side kick and rock through all that crap. I am glad I had her to lean on because I am not sure how well I would have dealt with things had she had not been there. She is the sweetest, funniest, and wittiest person I have met. She is honest and never holds back. She is genuine and "sparkles". She introduced me to the world of reading and opening myself to things I have never considered before. I have been able to tell her things that I have not told anyone before about my relationship with my dad, my view on religion, my anger towards God at one point for taking away my grandpa.....All my confussed feelings. She was able to make me feel comfortable enough to talk about those things and to be willing to listen to what someone else has to say. She is moving too! She will be joining Jake in Utah....I guess I have to go there now :)

These are just snipits of how I feel about these people. I don't like to get too mushy but wanted to share my apprecaition for these amazing people in my life. That is all for now. I'm sure I will have more to write about soon because my life is never dull!

EXCITED!!!!!

Today I have an interview with Aetna for a Claims Benefit Analyst position. It is not the one I want (I want the Provider Services Rep position) but it will help me get interview practice. The position doesn't pay well and I need something that will pay me the same if not more then what I am making now. I have the experience, the attitude, the drive, and the motivation to not make more money. Plus my current job pays for school and that is a benefit another company will need to compete with for me to leave. I am not excited for the interview today just because it is not the job I want to be interviewed for....But I figure I may make a good impression on someone who ends up talking to another manager down the road and gives me a recommendation. You never know! The good news is I applied for a Provider Services Rep position last Thursday and have not recieved a denial email yet, usually they send one within 24 hours of you applying. I am keeping my fingers crossed that it is a good sign and not the computer process being slow! LOL. My mom's manager is helping that department right now and loved me when I met her a few weeks ago so I hope that helps me get in. We will see!!! Wish me luck for the job I want.

Another Sigh.....Last one for the day

Thats it.....Today is just one of those days! Here is another Debby Downer blog. This time it is about work. Can I just say that I hate, HATE, my job? I really do. I wake up in the morning dredding the drive, sitting at work doing dumb-mans work, having my soul ripped out a small peice at a time, knowing I have to be morally gray and have no ethical standards - pretty much go against everything I am. I am a firm believer that you should love what you do and do what you love. I am doing neither. Funny thing is it didn't start out that way. When I first started working with my company I was optimistic, excited, and pumped to succeed and making something out of my situation. I was actually able to achieve that - I become a manager within a year and had my own building and team of 12 to manage. I loved my job - I truly truly did. Everything about it from the daily morning meetings, pulling up reports, coaching and training my reps, just chatting with them and getting to know them, even ordering the stinking supplies and stocking the bathroom. I was content and had never been happier professionally. Then the company just came and took that all away from me in one blow. The company re-orged and we were moved to a completely different world. We ended up in the call center of all places! That place had no morals, values, or soul. It sucked the life out of you as soon as you parked your car in the parking lot. There was no escaping that feeling of despair. The happiness was stolen from me and my team but we still tried to make the best out of it. You can only get squirted in the eye so many times by lemons before you throw that shit out into the street to get ran over by a car. I have been trying to get myself to stick it out, "just a little bit longer" I keep telling myself. But I am just drained - emotionally, physically, mentally. I have just 4 classes left in my degree that I can take somewhere else (electives) and I have been applying like a mad woman for jobs at Aetna. That is where I want to be. I feel my heart is in the health care field. My whole family has been in that field. I like to help people and feel I can do that in the health care field. My real desire is to be a Provider Services Rep and work my way up. I go to the company's site every day, three to five times a day, looking for positions, for that ONE position, and applying to whatever I can. FINALLY that position was listed and I applied so fast it was like lightning. I am keeping my fingers crossed that I can get it! I have no experience what so ever in the health care field but I know I can do it. There is no doubt or question in my body - I CAN DO THAT JOB. I don't look at my lack of experience as an obstacle, I look at it as a challenge. One I am eager to take on. Cross your fingers for me :)

Questions, Anxiety, What If's, Hurt.....

My mom is amazing and someone I hope to be when I grow up. She is strong, loving, successful, capable, fiesty, smart, beautiful, funny, goofy, and geniune. She also has rheumatoid arthritis and has been suffering from it for the past few years. Her stage of rheumatoid arthritis is pretty advanced. What is rheumatoid arthritis? It is an autoimmune disease that causes chronic inflammation of the joints. It can also cause inflammation of the tissue around the joints and other organs in the body. Pretty much her body tissues are mistakenly attacked by her bodies own immune system. It is referred to as a systemic illness and can last for years. Some patients may experience periods of time where they have no symptoms but this is a progressive illness and has the potential to cause joint destruction and functional disability.

You think that sounds bad, check out the symptoms. Symptoms include fatigue, lack of appetite, fever, muscle and joint aches, and stiffness. Multiple joints are usually inflammed in a symmetrical pattern and most of the small joints like your hands, wrists, and feet are involved. Simple tasks like turning a door knob or removing a staple from a peice of paper become difficult and painful. There is also dryness in the eyes and mouth. It also affects the lungs and causes chest pain with deep breathing or coughing. It also affects the amount of red and white blood cells a persons body has and this can affect the spleen and increase risks of infections.

There isn't much out there to help this disease. A medicine will work for a while but it always stops working. There is no cure for this. The goal of most current treatment is to reduce joint inflammation and pain, maximize joint function, and prevent joint destruction. What really sucks in the medications usually bring about more symptoms that are worse then the pain itself!

My mom always complains about hurting but today it really hit me. I thought it was just like a cramp pain or a soreness pain like when you hit your elbow into the edge of a corner. My mom has been really bad lately because she stopped taking her medicine. Eventually it just stopped working for her and she was in pain and figured she might as well not be on the meds if that was how it was going to be. My mom was in tears just from the pain and this is a woman who is strong and does not show emotion from pain. She told me today she couldn't even grasp or hold up a stack of paper, take a staple out of a peice of paper, turn the key in her car.....I have never seen my mother in so much pain, look so weak and fragile, and so lost. She is giving up and the pain is becoming too much for her. I realized that this disease will not stop, she will never get better, and it will only get worse. This disease will cripple her if not kill her.

I can not imagine my life without my mom in it and this scares me more then anything ever has. What would I do? How would I be able to pick up the pieces and carry on without her? I talk to her multiple times a day, see her almost every day of the week. She is my best friend and keeps me going when I want to give up. What about my brother? He is only 5....Who would take care of him? What would we tell him? How can we help make him understand what is going on? How will this impact his life? I don't know what to do to help her feel better and I am not sure I could even if there was something I could do. I feel lost and it breaks not just my heart but my soul to see my mom in such pain. She goes to the doctor on Wednesday but that is still five days away....things can get worse for her by then. I am not sure she can take much more or much worse then she is dealing with now. I can't believe how selfish and naive I have been and realize how much more I could have done to help.

I am glad I started this blog because I need somewhere to go and just get my feelings out. I want to cry so bad but I stop myself. It is a sign of weakness to me. Crying solves nothing, it helps nothing.....So why do it? I just keep moving on. I really want to just stop myself, shake myself out from this fog, and allow myself to feel emotion. The only one I have no problem with showing or feeling is anger. I don't know what to do. I can only wish for the best and pray for something to come along to help her because I could not imagine my life without her in it. I know one day she will have to leave but I want that to be when she is in her 80's to 90's, finished watching my brother grow up to be an amazing person, and watch me and my sisters grow. I want her to have a happy life full of good memories and not pain. She has so much to offer and gain and I don't want to see those opportunities taken from her. Not like this.....

I'm a Blogger Now!

Wow, where to start! First off my name is Liz, I am 23 (soon to be 24!). That puts me way too close to the "half-way-to-my-fifties" mark. At least I can get an insurance rate drop in another year Ha-Ha! I live in sunny, hotter then hell Arizona but I love it. You can go swimming 90% of the year, get a tan, and wear flipflops year round even when you have a huge jacket on. I started thing so I can stay in touch with some friends who will be moving on to bigger and better things - Megan moving to Utah, Jake, Mal and baby Connor moving to Utah, and Julie moving to New Mexicol. Obviously Utah is a banging spot - I'd go but I am too afraid I will touch a spec of Utah soil and burn up in flames :) Joking! Maybe? I am sure who ever visits this blog will read some pretty interesting things....My life is nothing close to boring! I can be intense, passionate, loud, obnoxious, friendly, outgoing, caring, and shy you name it, so I am sure you will read one thing and then another and be totally confussed. Its okay, I usually am too. Enjoy!